ADHD in Women Vs. Men: Why Good Treatment is Hard to Find

ADHD doesn’t discriminate based on gender, but boys are much more likely to be diagnosed than girls. Inaccurate stereotypes, gender roles, and biology all play a role in the bias of ADHD diagnoses.

Despite contemporary research changing the way experts understand ADHD, girls and women may have difficulty accessing the evaluation and treatment they need. As a result, women are less likely to understand the way ADHD impacts everyday life and may misattribute ADHD symptoms to personal failings. Here, learn about common ADHD symptoms in women, plus why treatment often differs based on gender. 

ADHD in Women: Symptoms

Did you know that girls and women are more likely to have symptoms consistent with the inattentive presentation of ADHD? Boys and men, on the other hand, tend toward the hyperactive-impulsive presentation of the spectrum.

Of all three ADHD subtypes, hyperactive-impulsive symptoms are most disruptive and most stereotypically associated with ADHD. This is one of the reasons boys receive evaluation and treatment: they’re more likely to display notable behaviors like interrupting in class, fidgeting, and getting up from their seats.

Girls, on the other hand, may struggle with ADHD symptoms that are more likely to go unnoticed or be dismissed by adults and caregivers– things like distractibility, difficulty focusing, and struggles with memory. 

As adults, ADHD in women symptoms can include: 

• Anxiety
• Depression
• Learning differences
• Memory struggles
• Social challenges (shyness, difficulty making or maintaining friends)
• Eating disorders like binge eating or restriction
• Emotional dysregulation, or feeling like you’re always on a roller-coaster of big wide-ranging feelings
• Emotions like irritability and frustration, which are deemed inappropriate for women
• Rejection sensitivity, which can lead to social isolation and perpetuation of challenging relationship dynamics
• Imposter syndrome 
• Physical symptoms like headaches, migraine, and gastrointestinal distress
• Overwhelm by noises, crowds, and distractions that don’t seem to bother anyone else
• Difficulty with boundaries at work, at home, and in relationships
• Constantly procrastinating on deadlines, even though putting tasks off is a huge source of stress
• Coping mechanisms like perfectionism and people-pleasing to cope with fears about not being good enough 
• Regularly shutting down from overstimulation or mental overload
• A sense that all your time and energy gets eaten up by simply trying to manage and get by as best you can, instead of enjoying life and relax. 

The above are common presentations of inattentive ADHD symptoms, as defined by the DSM-V. 

Three Reasons ADHD in Women Often Goes Untreated

Societal expectations, the tendency to internalize and mask symptoms, medical ignorance, and biology all play a role in why ADHD in women is often treated improperly or not at all. 

1. Societal expectations 

We’ve all been raised in a society that places certain specific pressures on girls and others on boys. Gender roles, whether understood or not on an individual level, are pervasive throughout society. Women are taught from a young age to:

• Be expert homemakers, caretakers, and parents
• Act pleasant and cheerful all the time
• Have very few boundaries

All of these expectations require a lot of executive functioning, organization, and setting aside one’s own values and boundaries for the benefit of others. Girls who struggle with these tasks are more likely to feel shame and mask their symptoms, trying to strong-arm their way through life. This leads to a lower likelihood of evaluation and treatment.

2. Coping mechanisms

Due in large part to the pressure on women to be “nice” and set their own needs aside at all costs, women are more likely to develop coping skills like people-pleasing and perfectionism in order to get through the rigors of life. These coping mechanisms can be very difficult to unlearn, and they often amplify ADHD symptoms and comorbidities such as anxiety and depression.

3. Biology

Women and men have different levels of hormones and chemicals cycling through their bodies at any given moment, which can have a huge impact on things like mood, sleep, physical health, and ADHD symptoms. Men, for example, have 24-hour hormone cycles, while women’s menstrual cycles last an average of 28 days. The world is designed around men’s hormone cycles, not women’s. Plus, stigma and misinformation about women’s health and hormones abound. All of these factors can amplify ADHD in women, but women are often not taken seriously in medical settings. Instead of receiving proper treatment, their symptoms may be dismissed or shrugged off. 

Proper Treatment for ADHD in Women Matters

Misattributing ADHD symptoms to personal failings can erode self-confidence and reinforce the belief that something is wrong with you. Girls who learn that their ADHD symptoms are personal flaws rather than a treatable condition become women who struggle deeply with a complex blend of shame, anxiety, depression, and ADHD symptoms.

Women deserve treatment tailored to them, their lived experiences, and their body chemistry. 

An an ADHD therapist and coach, I have years of experience working with people of all genders struggling to cope with their neurodivergence. If you want support, I’m here to affirm your challenges, set goals, and work with you to develop strategies that actually help you reach those goals. You can live a more balanced and empowered life, and the right support can help you get there. 

Learn more about my therapy services (including EMDR and talk therapy) if you’re located in Idaho or Iowa. For all other locations, check out my coaching services. My coaching program offers all the same expertise, tools, and guidance as therapy in a more direct and goal-oriented approach that you can benefit from anywhere. 

‍Reach out today to schedule a free, no-obligation consultation. Let’s start building a better future together.